Zande Warrior vs. Ninja

Disclaimer: I don't own Deadliest Warrior; but I wish I did.

Deadliest Warrior, Chapter 31: Zande Warrior vs. Ninja

                                                Redemption Match!

Narrator:
Zande Warrior, ferocious barbarian of Central Africa. Last time, however, that ferocity was not enough, and the Zande got himself brained by the Apache.
(We see the Apache smash the Zande's head in with a War Club).

Narrator:
Ninja, the legendary master of death from Japan. Last time, the master assassin took on and killed the Maori. Will he have as much luck this time with the Zande?
(We see the Ninja stab the Maori in the neck with his Kusarigama)

                                              WHO IS DEADLIEST?
To find out, our world class fighters are testing histories most lethal weapons. Using 21st century science, we'll see what happens when the two warriors go toe to toe. No rules. No safety. No mercy. It's a duel to the death, to decide who is....THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR!

Zande Warrior
Year - 1820
Height - 5' 9"
Weight - 170 LBS
Armor - Wicker Shield
Losses (1): Apache

Ninja
Gear - 10 LBS
Height - 5' 2"
Weight - 135 LBS
Wins (1): Maori
Armor - None

Narrator:  Here in the fight club, we take five weapons used by the brutally vicious Zande Warrior:

Makraka
Makrigga
Kpinga
Botto & Pima
Khanjar

Narrator: And pit them against deadly silent assassin, the Ninja:

Ninjato
Black Egg
Shuriken
Blowgun
Kusarigama

Narrator: For the first test, we lock blades as our warriors test out their close range weapons: The Zande's Makraka and the Ninja's Ninjato

Geoff: These weapons are both very deadly weapons. I don't know if I can call a definite edge between them.

Dr. Dorian: Well, if I had to pick one, I'd go with the Ninjato. It's a longer weapon, and has a bit more versatility then the Makraka. For those reasons, the edge has to go to the Ninjato.

Edge: Ninja 

Narrator: Next comes the second test, where mid range weapons clash: The Ninja Black Egg against the Zande Makrigga.

Dr. Dorian: As I think has already been established on previous episodes; while the Black Egg is good for stunning, it lacks the lethality of most other weapons. This of course includes the Makrigga.

Geoff: When you're right you're right doc. That spear is wicked lethal, and it definitely gets my edge.

Max: Agreed, mid range edge goes to the Makrigga.

Edge: Zande

Narrator: Next, comes the first of two long range weapons: The Zande's Kpinga will be pitted against the Ninja's Shuriken.

Dr. Dorian: Okay, now even though both of these are thrown weapons, I distinctly recall that the shuriken had a fairly low lethality factor.

Max: That's right, the most it can give you is a cut or scratch, but it's not likely to kill you. It would have to be very well placed.

Geoff: That's right. If it maybe hit a vein or a major artery, it could possibly do some lethal damage, but the odds of that aren't nearly high enough. The Kpinga on the other hand, is much larger, and the blades do way more damage.

Dr. Dorian: That's right, if it's thrown hard enough, you could possibly decapitate someone with it.

Max: I think that means that the most obvious choice for the edge is the Kpinga.

Edge: Zande

Narrator: Now let's take a look at the other long range weapon each of these two deadly contenders use: The Ninja Blowgun against the Zande Botto & Pima.

Dr. Dorian: Okay, both of these weapons use poison, so if they hit you, the odds that you'll die go way up. That said, the Botto & Pima has a much larger range then the Blowgun, allowing arrows to be fired from a much greater distance. It's not much, but it's enough to give the Botto & Pima an edge over the Blowgun.

Edge: Zande

Narrator: For our final test, our two teams will show off their special weapons: The Zande Khanjar and the Ninja Kusarigama.

Because this is a new weapon, weapon tester Bob will test out the deadliness of the Khanjar dagger, on a ballistic gel torso.

This is a Khanjar.

Bob takes a stance, waiting for Geoff to give the signal. When he does, he leaps foreword, knife raised. The knife sliced through the gel torso's flesh, sending blood falling to the floor. A slice to the throat nearly decapitated the head from the shoulders. Clearly a deadly weapon.

Dr. Dorian: While this is indeed a deadly weapon, I notice that is a very close range weapon. It requires the user to be very close to the target.

Max: This one is obvious. The Kusarigama has multiple uses, and has a much greater range then the Khanjar. While the Khanjar is deadly, it's nothing compared to the Kusarigama.

Edge: Ninja

Narrator: With all the testing complete, Max Geiger uploads the data gathered from the tests into the battle simulation, developed by Slitherine Studio, to simulate a battle to the death between these two warriors. To make sure that victory isn't snatched by a single lucky blow, the battle will be simulated 1000 times. Who will win in this battle of two very different opponents? The Ninja, Japan's master assassin? Or the Zande, Africa's unstoppable berserker?

Close Range Edge: Ninja's Ninjato

Mid Range Edge: Zande's Makrigga

Long Range Edge One: Zande's Kpinga

Long Range Edge Two: Zande's Botto & Pima

Special Weapon Edge: Ninja's Kusarigama

It's time to find out which warrior is truly the deadliest. Max hits the button on the computer, and suddenly the screen goes "Matrix" on us.

Since every fight in the 3rd season were all groups fights, I shall try my hand at having a group fight. As such, this battle will be between five Zande tribesman and five Ninjas.

At night, five ninjas, each cloaked in black creep through the dark forest. There, they come across a Zande camp, where three of the Zande are sleeping, while the last two keep watch. Two ninjas nod to each other, before making their move through the underbrush. The first Ninja prepares a Blowgun, while the other sneaks up with a Ninjato.

The one with the Ninjato strikes first, jabbing his blade through the back of the Zande's throat. However, the Zande's bloody croak, combined with the sound of his Makrigga dropping to the ground, alerts the other Zande that something is a miss. As he turns on his heel to face his friends attacker, a poisonous dart just barely misses him, hitting the tree next to his head. Seeing the dart, the Zande's head snaps in the Ninja's direction, a shout on his lips which wakes the rest of the Zandes.

Zande: 4
Ninja: 5

The still living guard charges at the Blowgun Ninja with his Makrigga, ready to skewer him. The Ninja desperately tries to feed another dart into his Blowgun, but is forced to dodge a deadly stab from the Zande's lance.

The other Ninja pulls his sword from his foes neck, and makes his way over to help his comrade. But halfway there, one of the other Zande's grabs a Kpinga, and tosses it with all his might. The blades hum through the air as it flies, before slamming into the Ninja's back, one of the blades piercing out his front. The Ninja gives a horrible scream of pain, before falling to the ground dead.

The scream attracts the attention of the still fighting Ninja and Zande. The Zande turns his head to look just for a second; but that's enough time for the Ninja to shoot a dart at the side of the man's neck. Once he sees it hit, he turns to run, even as the Zande's Makrigga nicks his side.

The Zande leader stands up holding his Botto & Pima, and fires a shot at the fleeing Ninja, which hits him in the arm. The Ninja disappears into the darkness, meeting with his fellow Ninja. While the loss of one of their own is sad, they must finish their mission and kill the other Zande. A task which will be made all the harder now that the Zande know their there.

The Zande split up to search for the other Ninja, and any allies he might have hiding with him. At the same time, the Ninja's split into two teams, each one setting out to hunt down a separate Zande group.

Zande: 4
Ninja: 4

Silently moving through the forest growth, a Ninja with a Kusarigama and the Ninja who had the blowgun find two Zande: one with a Makrigga, and one with a Makraka.

While searching, the Zande with the Makrigga starts breathing heavily, his face covered with sweat. As the other Zande notices and asks what is wrong, the poisoned Zande clutches his chest, and drops to the ground, dead as a doornail.

At the same time, the Ninja with the Kusarigama moves to strike him from behind, while the Blowgun Ninja stays in the back just in case. But Blowgun Ninja wasn't feeling so hot. His limbs felt heavy, and it was getting hard to breath. Before he could say anything, tunnel vision set in, and he collapsed; falling dead to the floor.

Zande: 3
Ninja: 3

Not knowing his comrade is dead, the other Ninja moves forward. Gripping the chain, he twirls the weighted in of the Kusarigama a few times before he tosses it. But the clinking of the chain is enough to alert the Zande to his attacker. Turning, the ball on the Ninja's weapon hits his shoulder and not his head. It hurts, but it's not lethal.

He raises his Makraka and charges, but the weighted ball comes back and strikes the blade from his hand. Another swing has the ball wrapped around his ankle, and before he knows it, the Zande is pulled off his feet and sent crashing down.

Seeing his chance, the Ninja rushes forwards to finish the job. As the blade of the Kusarigama prepares to enter the Zande's heart, he manages to capture the hand in a deadly grip. While still holding the hand, he uses the other to deliver a powerful sucker punch to the Ninja's chin sending him falling back.

The Zande makes to grab his Makraka, but the Ninja kicks him in the face. But when he tries again, the Zande grabs his leg and bites him, his filed teeth easily piercing flesh. The Ninja cries out in pain, distracted long enough that he doesn't stop the Zande from grabbing his sword. By the time he notices, its too late. The Zande buries the blade in one side of the Ninja's stomach, and slices through to the other side, disemboweling him in the process. The Ninja gives one final scream, before dying.

Zande: 3
Ninja: 2

A Zande wandered the underbrush uncertainly. He had separated from his partner, and in the dark, had gotten somewhat turned around. He didn't want to call out, and risk alerting the enemy to his position, which was what lead to him walking half blind through the woods.

Suddenly, a chain shot from the woods, and wrapped around his Makrigga spear. With a  sharp tug, it was jerked from his hands and he was sent stumbling forward. That was when the Ninja emerged from the darkness to strike.

He brought his Kama blade up to pierce the Zande's heart, but found his hand caught mid strike. The Zande tried to retaliate with a left hook, but the Ninja caught that. As the two stood there, each trying to overpower the other, the Ninja lashed out with a kick that caught the Zande in the stomach. He followed that up with a headbut, which sent his opponent stumbling back. Before he had a chance to recover, the Ninja grabbed the chain under his Kama blade, and and spun the sickle towards the injured tribesman. Said Zande hardly had time to react when suddenly a sharp blade buried itself in his ear, piercing his brain. A sharp tug brought the instrument of death back to the Ninja, who watched dispassionately as the Zande fell to the ground, dead.

Zande: 2
Ninja: 2

Meeting up with the other Ninja, the two assassins made their way through the brush in search of their prey. Spotting a Zande, the two quickly formed a plan, then made their move.

The Zande heard a rustle in the bushes in front of him, just as a Ninja appeared from behind a tree. The Zande raised his Makraka, ready to charge, when he felt a sharp pain in the back of his legs. Turning, he saw another Ninja, Shuriken in hand. That shuriken was quickly tossed, where it joined others that had stabbed into the back of the Zande's legs.

The Ninja charged, his speed a great advantage against the slowed Zande. Their blades clashed, but the Ninja twisted his blade and disarmed his opponent. Before he could stab the Zande with his blade however, the Zande slammed his fist into the Ninja's throat, making him choke and gasp, dropping the Ninjato in pain. The Zande grabbed the Ninja by his tunic and slammed him into the tree in front of them, even as the Ninja recovered and struggled. The only weapon the Ninja still had on him were a few Shuriken.

The Zande took the Khanjar from his belt, preparing to finish the Ninja. Before he could, the Ninja grasped the Shuriken at his own belt, and with them, drove the blades into the Zande's throat. The wound was clearly a lethal one, but it wasn't instantly fatal. This gave the Zande enough time to enact his revenge. In one swift motion, he took the Khanjar and drove it into the Ninja's brain. The Ninja twitched, then was still. The Zande grinned, before coughing up blood and falling backwards, as dead as his adversary.

Zande: 1
Ninja: 1

The head Ninja crept through the woods, finding himself back at the Zande's campsite. Across from him, he saw the Zande come out from the foliage, stained in the blood of the Ninja's comrades. The Ninja took a ready stance with his Ninjato, while the Zande did the same with a Makraka and Khanjar. The two of them stepped forward, and began circling one another, the Zande's campfire between them.

Then, with a furious roar, the Zande leapt over the fire and swung his Makraka downward. The Ninja blocked with his Ninjato, but quickly had to sidestep a thrust from the Khanjar. He sliced at the Zande's chest, leaving a deep scratch, but was rewarded with a slice in his arm from the Zande's dagger for his trouble.

Forced on the defensive, the Ninja waited for an opportunity to strike. When the Zande went to take his arm off with a downward strike from his Makraka, the Ninja leaned to the side, the blade hissing as it sliced through the air. Even as the blade passed him, he sliced upwards with his Ninjato. The long steel blade hit the Khanjar and knocked it from the Zande's grip, sending the blade falling to the floor.

Taking the Makraka in both hands, the Zande stepped back, catching his breath as he tried to make a plan of attack. At the same time, the Ninja also stepped back, his hand slipping stealthily into his cloths and grabbing a small black object.

A moment later, the two charged each other again, thought now the Ninja had his Ninjato in one hand. When they collided, the Zande's Makraka easily pushed forward, inching closer and closer to the Ninja. The Zande smirked, sure he was going to win this contest of strength. That was when he saw the Ninja's other hand coming around.

With one deft movement, the Ninja tossed the Black Egg into the Zande's eyes. At such close range, there was no way he could miss. The Black Egg shattered, spreading it's contents into the eyes of the Zande. As the glass dug and cut into his corneas, the Zande reeled back in surprise and pain. Taking hasty steps backwards, he tripped over his feet, and fell backwards into the campfire.

The Ninja watched as the Zande's cloths caught fire, and the Zande cried out from having both his eyes damaged and his back burned. He moaned as he rolled away from the fire and shakily stood up, one hand still on his eyes. Deciding that he should just end it, the Ninja stepped forward. With one swift motion, his Ninjato separated the Zande's head from his shoulders. The head hit the ground and rolled away, and the Zande's body collapsed.

Flicking the blood off his blade, the Ninja nodded his head to his fallen foe, before turning, and dashing back off into the shadows of the night.

Winner: Ninja

Ninja: 553

Kusarigama: 255

Ninjato: 188

Blowgun: 60

Shuriken: 50

Black Eggs: 0

Zande: 447

Makrigga: 130

Makraka: 120

Kpinga: 100

Botto & Pima: 86

Khanjar: 11

Narrator: In this climactic battle of two very different opponents, it was the Ninja who snatched up victory. While the Zande was strong in almost all his weapon categories, it wasn't enough to overcome the Ninja.

Dr. Dorian: While both warriors wear no armor, both are very different fighters. The Ninja is great at killing silently and stealthily, while the Zande could probably rip you apart with his bare hands. But the Ninja is cunning, and won't always fight fair. Their strategy, and the effective way they used their weapons, is probably what sealed their victory.

We see the Ninja running through the shadows. With the rest of his team dead, he wanted to take extra care not to be caught by any more enemies. At his hip is the Khanjar knife of the Zande. He had taken it to remind him of one of the stronger opponents he had faced. Now all he had to do was heal himself, and prepare for the inevitable next mission.

The End.